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Premature ejaculation PREMATURE EJACULATION
What is it?
A condition in which a man ejaculates before his penis erects, at the moment of penetration or immediately afterwards. There have been many more lengthy and complex definitions but this is a workable one for all practical purposes.
What causes it?
There are probably about twenty reasons for premature ejaculation but the most common is that the otherwise normal man has not learned to recognize the sensations that immediately precede ejaculation. In most animals copulation is a very brief business but humans have developed skills in prolonging the whole process of arousal and delaying ejaculation so as to give both participants more sensations.
Just why some men can't recognize the 'almost there' sensations and go beyond the point of no return before they want to is a complex subject and involves both physical and psychological factors.
• Physical disorders of the man's genitals are rare causes-most men have no medical or anatomical reason for their premature ejaculation.
• Much more common, though, are the psychological causes, which include: a fear of women; a fear of being controlled by women; the view that women are really sexless and so don't want a man to ejaculate in them; the view that sex is an unwelcome assault on the woman; and a general anxiety about or fear of sex. Such views are surprisingly common yet the man who holds them may not even realize that he does so-they are locked away in his unconscious mind. Previous bad experiences make many premature ejaculators worry that the same thing will happen again and they become so anxious that they ejaculate too soon once again.
• Poor masturbation training. Because of guilt a man may have masturbated only hastily and guiltily right from the beginning, with the result that as an adult he is programmed into speedy ejaculations.
• Furtive early intercourse, perhaps hastily in the back of a car or in the girl's home, can produce men who become locked into fast arousal and ejaculation cycles.
• Feeling unsafe and anxious for any reason can cause premature ejaculation.
• Not having had sex or masturbated for some time makes some men ready to ejaculate at a moment's notice.
• Some men with hostile feelings about their partner want (unconsciously) to punish her, so they withhold from her their ejaculation and the pleasure it gives her. Some men express their dissatisfaction or rage with their partner in this way rather than doing so outwardly. For a few men who cannot otherwise exert any power or control over their partner premature ejaculation is the only way they know.
• Fear of a particular sexual occasion-especially when it comes to extramarital sex-is a common cause of premature ejaculation, and many young men are so anxious at their first intercourse that they ejaculate too soon.
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